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Hey friends, welcome to the Her God Story podcast where you will always hear a good story to encourage
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and inspire you in your walk with God. I'm your host, Jodie Chiricosta, ministry leader at Somebody
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Cares America and international and author and traveler on this journey with Jesus. Would you do
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me a favor and rate or review this podcast through the link in the description or show notes? You can
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also do it through your favorite podcast streaming platform that will help others find this podcast
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too. And don't forget to get your free six-week devotional on Women of the Bible at hergodstory.org.
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The Reverend Billy Graham said, sometimes our way lies in the sunlight. Other times it lies in the
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path of sorrow. Yet even sorrows turn to blessings when they make us less attached to the world
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and more attached to God. Then more than ever we discover that Jesus truly is our friend.
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We all go through times of joy, blessing and peace. And we also go through times of challenge, sorrow
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and some even tragedy. We must turn to Jesus in the midst of it all. My guest, Laura Husband,
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has experienced both joy and sorrow. Laura is a performer and speaker who lives in the Houston
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area. And when she was 12 years old, she lost her father, Colonel Rick Husband, when the space
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shuttle Columbia broke apart 16 minutes prior to its intended landing. With the eyes of the world
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on her and her family, Laura grew up quickly and her relationship with the Lord is what carried
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her and still carries her through. Welcome, Laura. Thank you for having me. I'm glad to be here.
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Laura, your life has a clear demarcation line before the Columbia accident and after. Tell us
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about life before Columbia and when did you put your faith in Christ? Yeah, so I grew up in a very
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loving home, loving family. Both my parents followed Jesus, strong believers. I had a younger
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brother, but early, early on my dad was Air Force. So I was born in California at Edwards Air Force
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Base. And then the first place I remember is England. We moved there and he was an exchange
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test pilot in the Royal Air Force. So early childhood was in England. I had a British accent
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when I was little. And I remember going to church with my parents and there was this moment at four
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years old where I thought about just, okay, my parents have something that I don't, but it's
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something I want. And I remember going behind the couch and praying and just inviting God into my
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life. And my parents were a big part of that, of just demonstrating they had something in them that
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I wanted to. And as I grew older, that relationship just grew. And I grew in my understanding and
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closeness with God. But from a very early age, I knew God and walked with him, thankfully,
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my whole life since. But then we moved to Houston when I was four years old. My brother was born
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soon after and my dad had been selected to be an astronaut at NASA. It had been a lifelong dream
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of his since he was four years old. And so we found ourselves in Houston, Virginia, and we
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found ourselves in Houston, Texas, with all the heat and mosquitoes. And he started training and
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had his first mission in 1999. And he was a pilot on the Space Shuttle Discovery. They were the first
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to dock with the International Space Station. And then his second mission, as you mentioned before,
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was Columbia, which he was the commander of. And they did spend 16 days in space before they were
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supposed to come home. And then unfortunately, we lost them during that landing. But up to that
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point, my childhood had been very loving, very safe. I felt very safe. I felt very encouraged by
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my parents and supported and had a strong community around us at our church. And a lot really wasn't
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of concern to me, you know, up to that point. As it shouldn't be for a child, right? Thankfully,
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yes. For some, it's not. So up to that point, I didn't have many concerns or worries. The Word
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of God played a pretty important role in your life, even at a young age. You mentioned kind of
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really digging into the Bible when you were in sixth grade. What was that about? What instigated
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that? Yeah, in sixth grade, that was a year before my dad flew his second mission on Columbia.
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There was kind of this time period where I started getting frustrated about how the Bible didn't
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speak to me. People would say, oh, the Bible speaks to them and, you know, moves them or changes them
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in some way. And I just felt like it was a dry book that didn't really have much relevance to my
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daily life. And I wasn't quite sure what people meant when they would talk about the Bible in that
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way, as if it's living and affecting them in these deep ways. And so it really was a God-preparing
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moment because as a sixth grader, I don't know if it really was normal, but I started reading my
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Bible more and read it a lot that entire year. Just started diving into scripture more and more.
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And I didn't really know probably in those moments what that meant. Maybe I think it was just like,
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okay, let's see what's, you know, let's try to allow it to happen to me too, you know. But
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there wasn't some big aha moment necessarily. And then when tragedy happened, I realized a lot of
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those verses that had been, as people say, hidden in their heart started coming back to mind, such
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as he's a man of sorrows acquainted with our grief. He's a father to the fatherless. He binds up the
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brokenhearted and he turns our mourning into dancing. And all these, you know, he's a God of
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comfort and he's our provider. And all these things that I had read or heard about, but now I really
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needed them to be true and not just nice things to say. And that was kind of that moment, my mom
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refers to it that way too, is where the rubber hits the road with your faith of, okay, either these
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are just nice things to say or hopefully they are true and hold weight and stand the test of
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difficulty. And I hope God is who he says he is because I really need him to be those things
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right now. And I watched him do that over and over in different questions and hard things that I went
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through, that I walk through now, knowing that his track record is good, even in the hardest moments
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that he does show up, he does provide, and he can be present in those difficult moments. Even as you
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get, as I got older and did counseling, sometimes part of that counseling work that people will do
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is ask you to go back to those places. And, you know, if it's with the understanding of God in the
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picture, you can even just ask God where he was in those moments, maybe when you didn't sense that
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or feel that. And it's cool to see how God can bring healing retroactively into those moments
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where you can see where he was working, even if you didn't know it at the current moment, visibly
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how. So I feel like I've had those moments even since too.
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Yeah, and it really was the Holy Spirit preparing you for all that lie ahead. And it was quite a road.
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I mean, when you were in seventh grade, your father didn't return from that space shuttle mission.
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You were expecting him to, and there was no reason he had been before. There was no reason for him not
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to come back, but there was a problem. So share just a little about that day and the following
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months and what that did to your identity and your faith. I mean, God had prepared your faith to
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withstand a lot, even as a child, which is amazing and encouraging that God holds all of us,
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no matter who we are or what age we are. But share a little bit about how that impacted you
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and what you went through. The faith component and addressing that first, people sometimes would say
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to me or my family, you're so strong. That's really hard to hear, to be honest, because
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we weren't so strong, but God was. And again, with faith, we can't do it apart from his
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assistance. He gives us and bolsters that faith in us. That's why in scripture it says,
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help me with my unbelief. When the guy talks to God and is like, I need help with my unbelief.
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So we can be in those places where we feel very shaky, unsteady, not fully firm, but knowing we
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have a firm foundation in the Lord. And yeah, that day we expected to see my dad land. We were
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excited. I was 12, my brother was seven, and we were standing at the runway in Florida,
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waiting for them to return. And we should have heard a sonic boom at the at a minute out.
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That's kind of a time marker of them being close when they break the sound barrier. And
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the minute on the countdown clock counted down to zero. And then it started counting back up
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positive numbers. And we're kind of taking that moment in. And then I as a 12 year old,
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didn't pay attention to all of the mission control speakers, you know, the announcements
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happening over the speakers. And I hadn't really noticed that they lost communication
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with the crew already. And I went over to my mom and grabbed her arm. And I said, Mom, is daddy
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okay? Because I knew it was past the time they should be back. And she said, I don't think so.
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And I remember my stomach dropping and just feeling very out of control. In that moment,
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they rushed us to crew quarters, press were already trying to capture these early moments
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when we weren't even sure what was happening. And then they told us there wasn't any help for the
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crew. And so there was a whole variety of responses from our from the crew families just trying to
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process our grief. And even though I was 12 and didn't know everything, I grew up a lot that day.
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And but I knew God would take care of us. And I remember telling that to my aunt, that I said,
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I know God will take care of us. And I don't know how but I know he will. And I had a lot of
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questions like, who's going to help me with math? Who's going to walk me down the aisle one day? So
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big and small questions that all mattered, even if they were small or big. And it was just, yeah,
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pretty overwhelming. Just all the thoughts I think that bombarded at that moment of what's what's
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normal? What's this going to look like? Coming home to a house that was decorated to welcome my dad
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home and know that he was never coming back. And then, you know, floods of friends and family
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showing up. So there's just a lot of bustling activity and shock happening at the same time.
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And a lot of focus on us while we are trying to process this and grieve. And so it was that element,
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I think, especially grew me up more than some who might have gone through that at the same age,
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just because the pub public element of it for us. We had interviews, my mom never forced me to do
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anything, but there were times I was open and happy to share and talk about my dad. But it's still,
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there's this line of wanting to grieve privately. I didn't want to show my weak emotions or anything
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like that publicly. I wanted that to be private. I probably also felt very vulnerable and didn't want
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press to take advantage of that because they aren't always there for your best interest either.
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They want to some good press will give a good story and report the heart of someone's story.
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But there's others who want to evoke whatever emotion or tone they want to get out of you.
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So there were many things like that. And then meeting dignitaries and people, it was just a lot.
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So it really can grow you up. And each of the astronauts, as
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you know, is common left a message to their loved ones in case of the worst.
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And your father's words really strengthened your faith. I'm sure at the time it didn't feel like
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it was strengthening your faith, but it really impacted how you lived since then. What was that
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message and how did it impact you in the way you lived?
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Yeah, so all the astronauts have contingency papers. If something were to go wrong, they fill
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out their government document of what their last wishes would be. And all my dad wrote was,
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tell him about Jesus, that he's real to me. That's been a lasting message for my life of
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that's really what matters. My dad achieved his astronaut dreams. He did really cool big things,
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but what mattered at the core of it all was telling others about Jesus and that Jesus is real to him.
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And I also embrace that truth as well. And I did feel like it was a bit of an encouragement of how
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to live my life too. And so I think with that with the combined reality of life is short,
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and we're not guaranteed tomorrow. So don't waste time. I felt very motivated to
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share Jesus with my classmates, start prayer meetings, have Bible studies. I was in a private
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school, so it was easier and people were open to that. But not everyone at a private school is
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wanting to do that necessarily. And I just felt this push to want to share Jesus with others,
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knowing that he really is the difference when you hit these hard times. And he really is the hope
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you have beyond your biggest wildest dreams. He's the one who actually can align you in the right
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way to those dreams and also give you that hope when things completely fall apart too.
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Well, you mentioned that the shock took at least a year to wear off. And I'm sure the grief,
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you dealt with grief much longer than that. What really helped you through those times that the
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shock and the grief you personally? In some ways, that's that year is a blur to me. So
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I was, you know, 12. I was trying to go back to school. I missed a lot of school because
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and my teachers were very understanding. I was doing a lot of makeup work and traveling with
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my mom and we were doing a lot of memorial services and we went on to the Today show and
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my mom went on Good Morning America. It was in with the hope that we could honestly just share
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Jesus with people through at what we were going through. That's why we did those things. I flew by
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and I don't necessarily have, I have certain memories of people coming over, but yeah,
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it really all is a blur. But I do remember we were in England in that year after and I was
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sitting in our friend's living room and just it was sitting with me. Wow, I can't believe that
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really happened. And it just was still trying to settle in that they were gone. And that took quite
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a while. How did your community of faith? Did that have any ability to help your family through that
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time? Yeah, we, I'm very thankful we were part of a church family that for weeks and weeks, maybe
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months brought food, you know, and I remember my mom's roommates from college coming and you know,
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we had people almost like a highway coming in and out of our house from all over the place since,
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you know, my parents traveled in the Air Force. So we've known people from all over. So we were
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always having visitors from like every walk of life showing up. And my mom's roommates just were
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sweeping the kitchen, cleaning, doing subtle small things, quiet things without asking just to help
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my mom. And I picked up on that. And it's just, that's probably the best thing anyone could do.
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Is not specifically cleaning, but just serving and loving well without even using words. Because
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sometimes words really aren't, words don't fix it. They don't. Sometimes they can hurt it too. And
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you just have to have grace for people who are meaning well and not saying the right thing. But
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watching my mom's friends just love her well and fill in some gaps where it would just be hard to
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do some simple tasks like that. That was a really sweet way to see people showing up for us. And
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then a lot of people tried to show up for us that it's overwhelming, you know, and it's vulnerable.
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So not every person you feel is close to. So you just have to navigate even boundaries. So
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you just have to navigate even boundaries too within your own grief and who you feel comfortable
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with sharing what and as we were processing. But we did have some of those people that we felt very
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close to or even just could laugh with and enjoy moments in the midst of a lot of hard stuff.
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RG 5 years later, your mom remarried. And how did that impact you? Yeah, at first it was really
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difficult, mainly because it felt out of control again, it felt like a moment of not being in
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control. My mom didn't date around and it very much is a God thing. And I love Bill so much. And
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the end of the story is it's really good. And I'm very thankful for him. And it was the right
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timing even if at the moment it felt really hard. And I think for me it wasn't him specifically,
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there was a lot more than him. It was my grief. And it was realizing my dad's truly gone if my
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mom's remarrying. And not really wanting to open up my heart to another male father type figure
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either because I had felt abandoned by my dad. He didn't choose to leave, but he did leave via
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death. And that still feels like abandonment either way. And so I really didn't want to go
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through that again. So I think there was definitely some walls of even not wanting to hurt like that
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again. But God has brought it to a really sweet place with our family. But yeah, those early days
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were hard. I was 17 when they got married and I was trying to grow up in those moments too.
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Like I was about to go to college, grapple with, I guess life and what's next. And then this is a
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big life change too. Well, that tragedy certainly left an imprint on your life, but it didn't define
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you. You had a whole life ahead of you. And when you graduated from high school, you went to college.
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Where did God lead you and what did he show you during that time? It was very formative years
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for everyone. I was excited to go to school. And it's interesting the further away from
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the moment I lost my dad, the more things you could play the what if game. And I don't think
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I would have gone to this amazing school that I got to go to. There's a lot of things that
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may have not happened the same way. And so it's a weird feeling of what would life be like if he was
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here or wasn't, you know. But I was thankful that, you know, God opened the doors to go to a great
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school. I went to Trinity University in San Antonio, a liberal arts school and was able to study a whole
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variety of things from Spanish to music to religion, all the world religions and had a lot of
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had a lot of international students and on campus. And it was just a great environment to be in to,
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yeah, consider who am I? And what am I made for? And what do I want to do? And I think you keep
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asking that question the rest of your life. But so I don't know if that's always told to college
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students that you keep, you know, chipping away at what God's calling you to as you go. And he
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reveals more and more. But I really enjoyed that time getting to really dive deeper into things I
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was passionate about. And it wasn't always easy. I was a religion major. I was studying all the
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world religions and, you know, I was a Christian in that environment and really no one, hardly
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anyone else was. So sometimes my faith was seen as, I don't know, probably seen as a weakness
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where I, you know, had to learn how to really meet people where they were at in that academic
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environment and back up all my beliefs or research with, you know, strong, strong defenses.
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And but it made me a better researcher. It made me a better communicator. It made me
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dive into more of what do I believe and why do I believe it? And is there credibility to it? And
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I came back stronger in my faith and being able to, you know, explain and discuss it from an
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academic point of view and in a deeper way. So I'm really thankful for that environment.
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Yeah, it really solidified your ability to communicate all that you believe and why you
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believe it. So you came out of that and what was next? After that, I definitely kind of did a very
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different thing than that. I went to some place called Canuckuck Institute, which was a biblical
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studies grad program. And so it was faith based. The people in the program were Christian. So then
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I spent a year studying the Bible with other, you know, fellow Christians and looking at that
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as how do I let that be the foundation of my life? You know, as almost like a launching board before
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I start any kind of career. And so that was a really special year of diving into the Bible,
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letting the Bible be the textbook. We weren't reading a bunch of Christian authors. We were
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reading the Bible, which was great, because sometimes that's what we like do the least
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when we're looking for answers. And that really is the answer. And I got to dive into that
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deeper and deeper and ask hard questions. We had panel panels at the end of the year where
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we would be asked real life scenarios and what scripture would we use to help encourage or,
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or, you know, like provide to somebody who might be going through something. And all we could use
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was our Bible. We didn't have these other things we were pulling in. So it was a great year of really
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strengthening us and understanding that the Bible is the safe and good place to go first.
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And God is a good place to go first rather than, you know, horizontally, but go vertically and then
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bring in your community. And then after that, they also implemented accountability. So as we're doing
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that whole year of, you know, studying scripture and understanding that it has power to it, it has
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strength and answers in it. How do we then let it evaluate and change us, heal us, as we walk through
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our own daily things. And so we were assigned accountability partners. And I really loved the
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structure they built around that. They, you come up with the questions yourself to have your
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accountability partner ask you. And then you can't be mad at them when they ask you about those
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specific things, because it's already, it's, it's pre-prepared. And the whole point is for you to be
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able to confess or be open or celebrate whatever is happening in your life before the Lord, and
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then have a witness really present. They're not there, the other person's not there to scold you
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or correct you. There, there is just a witness really to hear you as you're sharing what's going
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on in your life to God. And then you're able to together see the ways that God then moves through
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those progressive meetings of accountability and see each other grow and be able to be healed from
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things or overcome things. And so that's something I took with me after the Institute. And I have an
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accountability partner, another girl who also went through Canock Hook Institute, and we, we still
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touch base and do accountability questions roughly once a month, give or take. And it's, it's a
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lifelong thing that I hope to continue to do, because I think it really gives a lot of, it feels
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very freeing actually to just be open. You already internally know what's going on. So when you just
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acknowledge it, it removes some of that power that the enemy wants to have over you. Especially if
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it's a sin related thing, it's, it's so important to just openly say that with another human being.
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Knowing that you're talking to God and that he will, he already knows and he can be the solution
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and the help in that. And then celebrating too, those moments of seeing God flourish or work
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through you, because you were in the right place and you spoke up and said something to someone and
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then that encouraged someone else. You know, those, it's really cool to be able to highlight and
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really see those moments where God is working and it helps when you share it with someone else,
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because then you're not passing it by. You're really celebrating and acknowledging movement from God.
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Yeah. Well, there is a scripture that says, confess our sins one to another, right?
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Yes.
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But share, just so our listeners who may have never heard of this concept, or may be really
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intrigued by it and saying, how can I implement this in my life? I'd love that. Share just a few
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of the questions that you've come up with or that, you know, one of your accountability partners
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have come up with that you use on a regular basis in your life.
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Yeah, we roughly do 10 or so questions and they honestly, it is very much something you can tailor
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to what you know are your needs. And definitely do it honestly. You can just like ask soft
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questions so you can give soft answers. But it's not meant to be a scolding session either. But
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so we go through and it's not meant to be legalistic. I guess that's the other preface I want to say.
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This is not to check boxes. It really is an organic conversation with another person, just like
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God is in relationship with us. That's an organic relationship we can have and talk to him. So we
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ask, how has your time in the Bible and prayer been? So we ask about like time studying scripture
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and prayer life. We ask about how have your words been? Have they been uplifting or gossip or, you
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know, discouraging? Have you been encouraging? How have your thoughts been? How have you have
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you been disciplining God? I'm sorry. Have you been disciplining your body in a way that honors God?
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And so treating it like a temple. Have you, you know, been doing things like rest and exercise?
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Have you been even like consuming media that is life giving? You know, those types of things.
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What fruit of the Spirit is lacking in your life and what fruit of the Spirit has been flourishing
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that you've noticed? What characteristic of God have you most recently noticed happening in your
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life or what scripture has been speaking to you? And then we ask, how are your have you been diligent
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in your finances? Are you tithing? You know, are you honoring God? Are you being kind to God?
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You know, are you honoring God in that way? So I think it kind of covers all senses and all areas
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possible. And if you know that there's a certain area for you that's more difficult, then it's good
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to get specific and ask your accountability partner to be like, hey, I'm trying to budget.
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Ask me if I filled out the budget form, you know, something like that even is really helpful.
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And you really has to be someone you trust, right? Yes. Because you're bearing your soul to them.
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Yeah, it needs to be someone who also agrees that this is an effective tool that God uses in our life,
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which is that confessing and being open before the Lord and knowing that he's the,
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he's the problem solver, not us. And then it's someone trustworthy, because yes, you're sharing
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deep things that maybe you haven't shared with anyone else. And you want to be able to create a
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safe environment for that. And and be able to, you know, honor that other person by being a safe
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space for them. Yeah. Well, that practice of accountability was so beneficial to you as you
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started and still is. And, you know, you moved from the biblical studies world, and you went into
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a totally different arena when you entered the world of theater. Yes. So how did that happen?
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And what have you seen? How have you seen God use you in that arena, which is, you know, very
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different from the heady world of biblical studies? Yeah, very different than heady. Yeah,
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that's for sure. It's not necessarily academic in that way, but also wonderful in so many other ways.
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I have always had arts in me since I was little, I did ballet and tap and choir and singing all
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growing up. So arts were always present in my life. And even in college, I classically trained in
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voice. I even though I majored in religion, minored in Spanish, I classically trained in
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voice and did theory classes, maybe not very well the theory part, but did those and did recitals
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and all those things. And even the year at Canuckuck Institute, I was able to serve in lead
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worship, play piano and sing. And it's just something that really feeds my soul. And I feel
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really alive when I'm in that kind of setting or environment of storytelling, creativity for the
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sake of just creativity or, you know, doing an actual show. So that fills a whole range of like,
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I enjoy even just cooking at home. And I consider that creative to working with your hands doing
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things and seeing something come to fruition after you've worked on it is, is just a sense of
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satisfaction. And so yeah, the year at Canuckuck Institute, I had known about an outdoor musical
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show called Texas in Palo Duro Canyon, I had grown up seeing it some, it's near Amarillo, my family,
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both my parents are from there. I always thought it would be so cool to be a part of that show.
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And so I found that the closest audition to me would be in Oklahoma. One of the girls at the
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show came with me, we drove there, auditioned, and then I got cast and that set the ball rolling for
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the next five years and the start of my professional performing arts career. So I don't know if I knew
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that that was next. But it's been in my heart since I was very little of enjoying that kind of
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experience. And it isn't even necessarily like how I was only training at college, but I'm so glad
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that that is the direction God led it. But yes, the environment shift was very drastic. It's not an
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environment that everyone believes the same as you. But similar to my university, it was almost
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also that way, a whole mix of beliefs. Then I went to Canuckuck, all Christians, went back to
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the theater environment, a whole mix of beliefs again. I kind of enjoy the ebb and flow of that,
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because it reminds me of God working. And we see evidence of him working even in people who
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aren't necessarily following Jesus at the current moment. But you see when you meet people who are
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not following Jesus, you can see glimpses of what God is still doing, because he is sovereign. He
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is in control. And if we truly are made in his image, there's something deep within us that draws
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to him. That's why we all really love a good story. And usually a good story has some element
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of sacrifice and good triumphing over evil. There's things in us that are drawn to things
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of who God is, whether or not we realize it. And it wasn't easy always. Some people knew I was
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Christian and might have written me off right away, but others not. I had really great friends
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we believed very different from one another. And we could have really amazing conversations,
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really amazing discussions. And it breaks down walls and barriers of you're this way, I'm this
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way. You can just love them. And also I love doing something like a show, because it's something we're
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collectively unified on and we're doing together. And we might not agree on all the same things,
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but we love doing the same thing together. And we can share that. And that is a really beautiful
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common ground place to be, is arts. So I hosted a cast Bible study for five years while I was there
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and always invited whoever wanted to come be a part. And yeah, it was really cool because people
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would come who are like, well, I might not believe this, but I'll come and like discuss. And it's,
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it always was great. It always went well. It was always good discussion. There wasn't this big,
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you know, I don't even know what people might assume would happen, but God would use those
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moments. It was really cool. It was discussions, not arguments and fighting. Right. Right. It was
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productive. Yeah. And encouraging. It didn't leave people in a worse place. It ideally was better
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after we were done with our discussions. So I'm, you just have to trust God knows what he's doing.
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And so you can just show up and be available and know that he's working in everyone's lives,
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including just because you're a Christian doesn't mean you're perfect. So in fact, when you're
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messed up in those kinds of environments, it's especially important to acknowledge your mistakes
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and be humble and, and try to regroup because eyes are on you. And it's important to highlight
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that because I think a lot of people who aren't in the church or following Jesus, a big struggle is
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hypocrisy is what they see. And so if you don't acknowledge when you make mistakes, that can be
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very harmful. So even in those moments, finding ways to really honor God through, through the
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imperfection. And you know, there's a scripture, I can't remember where it is right now, but we'll
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have it in our show notes that says God's word goes forth and always accomplishes what he intends it
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to accomplish. Just by getting the word out to people, God works in their hearts in ways that we
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can't, we can't see, you know, some water, some, some, so some water, some get to harvest, but all
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of us have a role as long as we're following Jesus and living our faith, like you said, which is not
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always easy when the world is watching, or even just when Christians are watching, that's probably
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even harder to be authentic and honest and honorable and in every way, because we, we want to
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pretend we're perfect.
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Yeah. And that's almost worse actually. So yeah, you are in an environment that's non-Christian.
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It's really important almost to, to do your due diligence of, I think of David when he made the
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mistake with Bathsheba, the repentance he expressed after that and that, and God, he was referred to
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in scripture as a man after God's own heart, and he wasn't a perfect man, but when it came to
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repentance, he acknowledged the depth of his mistakes. So I think that's really important so
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that hypocrisy isn't something people are left with, because we will make mistakes. It's just
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inevitable because we are not perfect people. We live in a fallen imperfect world and we're going
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to make mistakes. So, but I also will say to people who are newer to the faith or maybe not in it,
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it can be a really interesting environment because they might pick up on something in scripture that
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maybe you've read a million times and then they just noticed something new about it that you've
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never thought about because it's fresh to them. So that's also kind of a cool thing when you have
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people in your life who maybe are willing to look at scripture with you and then they have
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observations that can help you in your own faith too.
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And you know, The Lord had you at Texas, the show during a really key season because you were
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living your faith there, you were representing the Lord, when there were several tragedies
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that the cast experienced together, which was hard. Share about that season and how God has
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continued to the healing process in your life, even through those tragedies.
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Yeah, it was pretty heavy. My first summer there, our final week of our show, we run for about three
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months, our show six days a week. And our final week, we had our cast party on our day off.
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And that evening when we were all headed back, it was hosted at a place out a ways in the country.
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And so we were on farm to market roads. One of our cars of our cast members, they had a car
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accident and five of the six in the car died in that accident. And it was horrible. It was devastating.
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We all were coming back to Canyon, Texas, and called up to the office in this little small Texas
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square. And we heard the news and then started hearing the names of the people in the car and
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just triggered a lot of things similar to what I walked through with my dad of a group of people
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all dying at once. And they were living into their dreams. And all of a sudden, they're just not here.
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And that was, it's hard because they're not sick. They're not deteriorating slowly. And I know it
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doesn't diminish that way of losing life either. But it is whiplash when you
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don't expect it. It's just unexpected. So I do remember that night was just so difficult. And
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I remember praying for our group. And I think God had me there because I could relate already,
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I hope. And I definitely understood pain and loss. And it's still been quite the journey for all of
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us who have gone through that and for the parents who lost their children in that. But I did see God
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show up in a variety of ways. And even like that Bible study, we were a part of, two of the people
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in that car were in the Bible study that summer and just cherishing those moments that we had
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prior. And yeah, again, it's just this highlight of life is short and you just don't know how much
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time you have. And you want to know who you also can cry out to when things get rough and know that
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God is reliable and that He is the foundation. He is the strength you can turn to when things get
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hard. Like in poetic ways, God showed up. The next day we didn't do the show, but then the following
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night we decided we would do the show privately for family and friends with all the gaps of the
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people who would be missing on stage, which was very hard. But it was a very difficult
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show. It was very hard, but it's an outdoor show in a canyon and it started raining when we started
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the show and it stopped raining when we ended the show. And it was just poetically perfect. And it's
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just even in that way, God was meeting us through the weather. It was comforting because it was
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drowning out a little, the loud sobbing and just cathartic. And for the way we were feeling,
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lost our friends. There's just, you know, the timing of that was just too perfect to not be God.
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And we ended up doing the show the next three nights and re-spacing it and going to funerals
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or memorials during the day and then doing the show at night. It was very difficult. And I don't
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think I'll ever do anything like that again. But it was, yeah, it was really hard. But again, I
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watched even one of the guys that Summer in the Bible study later reached out and just talked
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about how his faith has grown since. And just things like that. It's really encouraging to see
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God's working in people's lives in ways we don't see ongoing. And we really are just, you know,
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hopefully we get to be a small piece of the puzzle in that. And it's not that he needs us,
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it's that we get the privilege of being used by him if we're willing. And yeah, then that's really
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a life-giving thing to be a part of. So yeah, we went through many things around that show.
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Two summers later, we lost our stage manager in a firework explosion on site. And it was a horrible
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accident that happened. And yeah, it's a lot of tragedy to just happen. And you could ask the
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question, God, why so much death? I lost probably close to 30 plus people since my dad, including
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him and the crew. And I had to process in counseling. Okay, this is not a normal amount of
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death toll for life, usually, unless you're in war or, you know, different circumstances. But it
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definitely started becoming what felt like the norm of like, who's next? And whose funeral are we
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going to next? And I had to understand that, you know, even if it had been a lot, I was still
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experiencing joy, I was still having healing. And even now, just, I continually see God's healing in
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my life and my joy for life. And even in the, I've, you know, dealt with anxiety and depression, but
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he still works through all of that. He still is the answer through all of it. And even though it
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gets dark, it's not hopeless. He's still present in all of it. Yeah, after five years, you just
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felt like the Lord had said, that's enough for the Texas show. And you moved back to Houston to break
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into the Houston scene. But as a part of that, you also continued that counseling process. And
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it took a little effort on your part to find the right fit. Yes, to make sure that you had somebody
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who you could really connect with in that, explain that process as well, a little bit, and also share
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about what God's teaching you lately. If you are considering counseling, or maybe you're begrudgingly
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considering counseling, because I don't know many people who are super pumped to go do counseling.
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If you are, that's awesome, because that's a step, a step ahead of most. Counseling serves such a great
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purpose. And I think God uses it as an amazing tool, because it's someone objective outside of
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yourself and your family and friends who doesn't have to be emotionally invested the quite the same
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way that you have dealt with all this tragedy or trauma or whatever you've walked through.
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And especially if they have good training, can help you pinpoint those ways that maybe there's
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there's roots to that or even, oh, by the way, you're not crazy for reacting that way, because
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this, this and this, you know, happened. So it's like validating in some ways of like, okay, well,
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I'm glad that my response, you know, was merited. It just like helps you understand yourself more
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and just pick up on things. And I've even done the counselor I go to now, EMDR work, which is
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rapid eye movement work. It's similar to when you process when you're asleep and dreaming, your eyes
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move and your subconscious basically files away your memories. This helps create that around some
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trauma situations if you have had trouble releasing those. And that's been very helpful.
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But it's, I found an amazing counselor now, but it took a little time. I,
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I, you know, be a consumer when you're looking for a counselor, it's okay. If you may not feel like
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it's the right fit, you don't have to stick with one person and just assume that it's, it's all on
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you. And you need to adjust to them if it really doesn't feel like a safe space for you to open up.
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Or if they're just being a yes man only, or they're, you know, being negative towards you or
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making you feel uncomfortable. Like those are all flags or red flags, you know, to try someone else.
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And I know it takes a lot to reopen up, share those hard things with a new person, but I do think it
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is worth it to yourself to find that good fit. And yeah, I had some interesting versions of
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counseling that were not good fits until I found the one that I'm currently with. And it's, it's
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okay to, to shop around and feel that out and make sure that you feel comfortable.
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And make sure that, you know, for, for your faith, make sure that they're, they're affirming
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of your faith, affirming of your beliefs and, and encouraging you and walking out what scripture would,
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would say is the right way to go.
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Yeah, that really helps for me because then I'm not having to
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explain that element with my counselor. And I did have one that was not of the same faith at one
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point. And I often found that I was kind of, I had just a different, I wasn't fully open. I was,
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I was trying to think of what I needed to explain as, as I was processing versus just being able to
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process. So it does help if you can just eliminate some of those things, if you can find that. That's,
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I know it is harder. It can be hard, but I encourage you to, to look for it if you're able.
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Yeah. Now that you're back in Houston, you're getting into the performance scene there. And
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in the midst of that, God's been teaching you about rest, share how that works together,
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trying to break into a theater scene and, and rest.
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Yeah. I've been working now in the theater scene in Texas since 2017. And I've been doing film as
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well. So I, I split my career time, I guess, between film and stage now, but that neither
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of those careers are naturally restful. They are not nine to five either. So there's no wall or
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structure around when you stop, when you go. And recently I read a book called Towards Rest from
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Alabaster Company. And it's encouraging, you know, as you pursue rest and move towards it, it is
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something that doesn't only have to happen as a result of exhaustion. And it also, rest should not
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be something that you do just so you can start being productive again. It should actually be
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just worthy because it is rest. And just like we are, like our creator, we're creative.
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He created six days and then he rested on the seventh and he called things good. He didn't do
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it out of exhaustion. He didn't create out of exhaustion. He created out of joy and out of a
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full place. And then he chose to rest not out of necessarily need, but out of worthiness that rest
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is, is worthy to do. So that's something I'm trying to implement more in my approach to my work is,
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you know, you get auditions coming in that you have to do a quick turnaround and prep for, but
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honoring, finding Sabbath rest, finding that, that day to unplug and in ways and just trust that God
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will provide in the moments that you're, you're not expelling energy and you're just
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worshiping and spending time with him or you're doing restful things. It's, it can look different
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for different people, but that's something I'm navigating and that affects you physically. It
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affects all effects, mental, emotional, spiritual, and then ultimately hopefully makes you a better
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creative in your work because then you're creating out of a fullness, not out of a depletion.
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Well, as we close Laura, would you share about a woman of the Bible who's inspired or encouraged
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or taught you something lately? I've been thinking a lot about Esther. Esther was put in a
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was put in an environment that was unexpected to her, that she didn't ask for necessarily.
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And the odds seem to be stacked against her too. And yet she was worthy to become the queen.
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And there's this verse, Esther 4 14, perhaps this is the moment for which you were created.
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And I love thinking about that verse in my own life of this is the moment for which I am created
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and which you are created. And so what does that look like in your life? And just like Esther didn't
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know the outcome, even walking into the king's court, not knowing if her bravery and courage
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would be honored or shunned, just embracing, trusting God through things that where odds might
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feel against you, or you have a giant unknown ahead of you, or you're not even sure exactly what
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you were made for. God put you right here right now for a specific moment in time. And we can
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trust that he will guide that process and open the doors that need to be open. Amen. Well, that
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reminds me of a very often quoted Bible verse, Bible passage really in Proverbs 3 verses 5 and 6.
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The New Living Translation says, trust in the Lord with all your heart. Do not depend on your own
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understanding. Seek his will in all you do and he will show you which path to take. And as we lean
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into God and we trust him through situations we don't understand and seek to do his will,
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he guides us and directs us in a unique way that each of us should go because each of us has a
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unique path, don't we? My path, your path, everyone's path is different. That was my dad's
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favorite verse. He wrote that on all of his astronaut photos. And so that's a perfect
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verse to share. It's one that I've carried with me too. Yes. Yeah, it's such a great reminder of
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when our understanding is one way, God's is above it and can guide us through. Well, Laura, would
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you take a moment and pray for our listeners? Dear Heavenly Father, I just thank you so much for
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today. For everyone who's listening, God, you know exactly what's going on in their life,
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where they're at, what their struggles have been, what they're going to face tomorrow. I think about
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the times that you put things in my life to prepare me for what was ahead. And I know you
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do the same for others. I pray that they would see and notice those moments that you are working
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in their life in ways that maybe they were blind to before. But you can open their eyes to see that
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you are present in the midst of those hard things and that you are there and that you love them.
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And perhaps this is the moment for which they were created and they can feel that sense of deep
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purpose beyond their circumstance in the moment. And if they have fear that it can be a moment
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of fear, that it can be left at your altar, they can release that to you and then trust that what
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kind of identity you want to put on them is one of strength and courage and bravery. And that can be
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empowered by your Holy Spirit to feel that strength in them and know that they can trust you as they
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take steps forward, not knowing what's ahead quite yet, knowing that you are good in Jesus' name.
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James James 1, 27 tells us that pure religion is to care for orphans as well as widows,
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and to refuse to let the world corrupt us. That is why Somebody Cares started the Widow and Orphan
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00:59:49,760 --> 00:59:55,360
Fund. Together we can do so much to help those with great needs. If you haven't done so yet,
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00:59:55,360 --> 00:59:59,920
would you consider joining us with a special gift to help widows and orphans through our fund?
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00:59:59,920 --> 01:00:04,960
Just go to the hergodstory.org website and click on the Widow and Orphan Tab at the top of the page.
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Thank you for tuning in. In our show notes at hergodstory.org you'll find scriptures and the
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other information we talked about. And remember, I would love to hear from you. So please email me
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at hergodstory at somebodycares.org. If you want to get that free six-week devotional on Women of
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01:00:21,640 --> 01:00:26,080
the Bible, you can find it on the website or purchase a 12-week devotional that we'll send to
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01:00:26,080 --> 01:00:32,360
you for just $12, knowing that all the proceeds go to our Widow and Orphan Fund. We'd love to pray
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with you on our 24-7 prayer and text line. So give us a call or text anytime at 855-459-CARE
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or email us at prayer at somebodycares.org. And now, dear friends, I leave you with a prayer
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found in Romans 15 verse 13. I pray that God, the source of hope, will fill you completely with joy
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and peace because you trust in Him. Then you will overflow with confident hope through the power of
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the Holy Spirit. Her God Story is a ministry of Somebody Cares America and international. To find
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out more about or support the ministry, go to somebodycares.org.
