Hope for the New Year, episode 127 (rebroadcast)

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If you love a prodigal, you can discover help and hope for your wilderness journey right here

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at the When You Love a Prodigal podcast. And also help and hope for your own life journey.

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It's the first of the year, isn't it? Hope, newness, resolutions, promises fulfilled,

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past forgiven. A new year lifts us up, shaking off the remnants of last year's mistakes,

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opening a panorama of a better future. We love to leave the hurts and failures of yesterday,

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believing that tomorrow is filled with sunshine and promise. Except when you love a prodigal.

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Too often, fears went out. You hope, but you dare not get your hopes up. You dream, hoping it doesn't

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once again become a nightmare. You believe, but always with clouds of doubt blocking the brightness

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you desire. In our Prayer for Prodigal site and Facebook page, we have had some wonderful stories

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of hope fulfilled and dreams coming true among those we have loved and prayed for this past year.

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We are so grateful and we praise God. It fills our hearts and our mouths.

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But we also have had disappointments, bad choices, painful separations, even tragedies.

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Hopefully, even in those, we can say, thank you, Lord. Because we have a faithful Father,

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a compassionate Savior, and a powerful Holy Spirit, and the assurance that all the promises

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of God are yes in Jesus. I'll say that again. We have the assurance that all the promises of God

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are yes in Jesus. Can we have hope for the new year? Surely so. Will all our desires and dreams

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come to pass? Probably no. Will our prodigals break our hearts again? Possibly so. Will we make

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mistakes as we seek to restore and reconcile? Without a doubt, we will make some mistakes.

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The only certainty we have in life and in life with a prodigal is God. The only certainty we have

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is God. He knows. He knows it all. He knows your plans, your prayers for next year. He knows the

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choices your loved one will make. He knows his grand plan and how this all will go.

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He knows the time and how this all works together. He doesn't just know, though. He cares.

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He looks at them and at us with tender tears. He feels the rejection, the loss, the fear,

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the disappointment. He stays with us through it all. He knows and he cares and he is able.

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He is not a God who wishes he could help. He can. He can help. He is El Shaddai, the Almighty.

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He rules heaven and earth and even our lives. He said nothing is impossible for him.

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So my challenge to you and to myself is to make God himself the object of your new year

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hopes and dreams, to seek him above all, to entrust my prodigal, your prodigal, and ourselves

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in his loving and able care, to surrender my plans, to believe God's intentions are very good,

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to trust his spirit, to give me everything I need with my loved one in the coming year.

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Gratefully, in my decades of walking with God, of experiencing his love, mercy, and grace,

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of seeing his faithfulness, I have learned a lot of realities and lessons that help me keep hoping.

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And because I need help remembering, I usually put my lessons in the slogans that will jog my

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memory. You probably know all of these truths already, but these memory applications,

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those little slogans, have helped me greatly. And my brief explanation of each one represents

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only a tiny fraction of all God has taught me through these lessons. So here are some

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of those things that I have learned. First, God is God and God is good.

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I can't tell you how many times I say that when things don't look good, but God is God and he is

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good. When circumstances are difficult, uncertain, painful, scary, or just not to my liking, I

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remember that God is truly God. He is sovereign, in control, aware, and able. So it is very good

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to know that he is also good. How frightening if this powerful God were evil. Jeremiah tells

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us that God is always looking for ways to do good to us. Second thing I've learned, the work of God

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is done on our knees. Then we find out what happened. Most of us pray a lot, especially when

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you have a prodigal. Morning and evening, maybe every meal when we have a need, we pray about

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everything. But I have discovered that prayer is not a necessary activity for my work and efforts

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to succeed. Prayer is my work. The fruit will then be discovered as I head out to live my life.

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Third, the greener grass was spray painted by the evil one. Most of us are addicted to the greener

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grass syndrome. We desire something that is newer or better or more fun, or we think some other

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place or job or person would be more satisfying. Sometimes God uses discontentment in our lives

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to spur us onto new opportunities. But mostly, he urges us to be content, to rest in his provision.

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The evil one loves to distract and attract us with his bright spray paint. We need, as Paul suggests,

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to choose contentment. Isn't that really true? We always think if this happened or I want this to

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happen or Lord do this and if we can ask him, but we need to have this open heart and mind that says,

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this is what I would like, but I want what you have Lord. And sometimes that discontentment

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leads us to a new opportunity. But a lot of times it just causes us to not be satisfied in what God

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has given us at this time. So we choose to be content with where God has us. The fourth lesson

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I've learned, always seek to encourage everyone. The usual understanding of encourage is to come

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alongside someone who is discouraged or feeling sad or fearful and by words and actions and

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presence to lift them up, to share positive attitudes, to give hope and help. And that's

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all good. But there's more to encourage than that. Another word that is similar and in the same place

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as encourage is exhort. And that conveys a fuller meaning. I usually define my sense of calling from

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the Lord to encourage God's daughters and sons to become all that God created them to be.

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And to do all that God has created them to do. And so I spend a lot of my time in life

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encouraging people, suggesting they could try this, assuring them that God will take care of this,

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especially encouraging people with prodigals that God's still in control. And so encouraging

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people is extremely important. But there's one more key part of encouraging. The literal meaning

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of encourage is to put courage into. And isn't that what it takes? Courage to follow Jesus,

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to discover who and why he made me, yourself, to pursue all that he has for us,

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and to keep hoping for a good future for a prodigal you love. So may I encourage you right now,

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God is still working. He hasn't given up. He knows what your prodigal needs. He knows what you need.

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And he is involved. He's engaged. And he will make it happen in the right way at the right time.

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The fifth lesson I learned, never settle for less than God's best.

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My kids probably heard that a lot when they were growing up. God tells us in Ephesians 2 10

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that he already has good works prepared for us to do. And though he provides all we need

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through his spirit, we still need to choose to work hard and to do the part that he has for us,

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for his glory. Sometimes I'm just too tired, or I have too many things on my plate to do any of them

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well. Or perhaps something else looks more desirable. I'd rather do that. I have told my

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children and myself many times, don't settle. Depend on God's guidance and strength and provision.

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Never settle for less than his best. And that includes in loving your prodigal.

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Keep loving, even when you have to have strong boundaries. It's important to have a strong

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foundation. Keep loving, even when you have to have strong boundaries, even when there are

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consequences, even when you don't know where they are. Keep loving. And God will give you

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the ability to do that. And then my last of these little lessons I've learned, there are many more.

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He's out. His way is always better than my way. When I came to Christ on New Year's Eve many decades

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ago, I didn't fully understand what I was committing to. But this I was sure of. I was choosing God's

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way instead of my way for my life. Now you have heard me say before that I always wanted my own

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way. So this was a significant commitment. And I would love to say that that choice settled it.

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But in reality, every day I get to make choices. Will I demand my own way? Or will I believe the

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truths that we've been looking at here and surrender to his will? Hopefully I will continue to

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choose his way over mine more and more. And mostly I have. And know this, this is important for you.

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My 15-year Prodigal Wilderness Journey has been a major teacher in my learning to trust God

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and choose his way. Something that we each need to understand, to grasp in the Prodigal Journey,

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is this not just about our Prodigal, the person we love. It's also about us. Because God's so

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creative and he's always working in us as well as working in that person we love, as well as pursuing

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them. And it's extremely important to allow God to do that work in us and to be responsive to that.

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Really and truly, God has taught me more almost than any other way through the 15 years of

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hard times with our Prodigal. I learned most of the things that I share on this podcast

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because I walked through that journey and God taught me things and God showed me things and

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he showed me who he is and who he will always be for me. I can trust him. And I believe that

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I can trust him. I hope these few highlights from my years of seeking to walk in the light

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will encourage you as they have guided me. May this coming New Year reveal more of God's creativity,

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love, and faithfulness for you and for your Prodigal. So take some time to think about

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life lessons that you've learned, but specifically lessons you've learned in this time with a

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Prodigal. And if you're real new in it, you'll learn some. Be alert. But if you've been on this

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journey for a while, God has been working in you just as he's working in your Prodigal. So

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identify something that you've seen him do in you, something you understand more than you ever have

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before, hard decisions you've been able to make, trusting decisions you've been able to make.

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Let God speak to you about the work he's doing in you as well as in your Prodigal.

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God bless you. Have a great New Year.